Birthday fun at Lagoon

This year, instead of having a big birthday party, Brody decided all he wanted to do was take a friend and go to Lagoon and stay overnight at Aunt Mony's for a couple of nights.  I told him that I was fine with what ever he decided he wanted to do. Going to Lagoon was going to be a lot easier on me being as how I was still on crutches, but I was really going to miss doing the big birthday theme party.

After really thinking about who he would like to take, he asked Tate Torgerson's mom (who is also his teacher) and she thought that sounded like fun.  A week to ten days before we were going to go, Liz called me and said Tate would be unable to attend because they had a doctor's appointment in St. George that she had forgotten about and is was that same day.  Brody was a little sad but he had a back up plan in mind.  He invited another little guy who was definitely not my first choice.  Hesitantly, I agreed to let him make his own friend decision and told him to go ahead and ask that little boy.  

He asked his "friend" if he wanted to go and plans were made.  We were planning on leaving after school on Friday and would pick the boys up in Loa.  When we got to the Elementary School on Friday, Haylie came bouncing out of the school with a very slumpy brother behind her.  My heart sank.  I just knew what was going on.  When Brody got to the car, I asked him where his friend was.  Brody's response "He's not coming!" followed by eyes full of tears.  He was absolutely devastated.  I called the child's mother and come to find out, this little boy had been going back and forth about whether or not he wanted to come since Wednesday.  Are you kidding me? I thought maybe I deserved a little heads up but obviously not. I was hurting for Brody, angry at the mom, and disgusted with the little boy.  How could you do that to someone that is supposed to be your friend?  The only way I could think of to calm our nerves was to try and turn it into a learning situation.  I asked Brody what he was feeling.  He explained to me that he was sad,  mad, his heart hurt and he didn't know what else. 

I took that as my cue.  I tried to explain to him the difference between true friends and so-called friends. True friends will go out of their way to be kind to you, and they care about your feelings. Someone who respects you and shows you they do by their actions. A true friend is a friend that will always have your back regardless of the situation without expecting anything in return.  So-called friends are the kids that will play with you, get in trouble along side you, and when it's time for discipline, will turn and point the finger at you to save themselves.  These so-called friends don't respect the feelings of others or care how much damage their actions may do.  They will lie, cheat, bully, and what ever else may suit them as long as they get what they want. 

Brody and I talked about it for quite a while.  He had told me numerous stories about this same little boy getting in trouble for things he had done at school before I agreed to let him go. Hind sight being what it is I should have stuck with my gut feeling and told him to choose a different friend.  We talked about choices that were made and how a different choice would have produced a different outcome. After crying for almost an hour, I got him settled down by telling him that maybe he and Dillon could go to Lagoon Saturday night just the two of them because I was proud of what an admirable young man he had become and I trusted him to go by himself and make good choices.

When we got to Monica's house she asked where Brody's friend was.  I told her what had happened and she was as angry as I had been.  We talked about it for awhile and decided we wouldn't focus on it anymore.  We were going to do everything in our power to make sure Brody had a good weekend and he did.

On the way home, I asked Brody how he was feeling.  He told me that he didn't think the little boy was a true friend and I told him I had to agree.  Brody said, "Mom, I am still going to be nice to him, but I don't want to be friends with him."  I told him that I was okay with that.  It reminds me of several conversations I've had with my "therapist" Dr. Daph regarding the unhealthy people we have in our lives.  Whether by choice or other means, these unhealthy people are not good for us.  They wear us out and make a definite negative impact on our lives.

I still get quite emotional when I think of Brody walking out of the school that day with his head hanging down, shoulders slumped, dragging his feet, and tears in his eyes.  I hope that this will be a lesson learned for him, and that he will learn and grow from it and he will actually think about how his actions may impact someone else.  I am very proud of my "little man" and the sweet spirit he has.  He has chosen some pretty good little friends now.  He is still nice to the other little guy but chooses not to play with him. Unfortunately for that young fella he has not made the best choices in friends and can't seem to stay out of trouble.  Another life lesson...actions/consequences???  I think YES! 

Dillon and Carter.

Brody and Haylie

Uncle Trev and Uncle Cory

Brody won himself a NY Yankees helmet by pitching 3 pitches in a row over 30 mph.

Shane and Haylie

I believe I can fly...

Brody's birthday posse...Tavia, Haylie Corbin, Triston, Hadley, Carter, and Dillon.

Frankenstein dropped by for a surprise visit.

One of Brody's favorite rides.

Waiting to go

Tons of fun!

They both loved this ride.

Fortunately for Brody, he has a true friend in his sister.  She is always there for him and even though they have their squabbles at times she has his back and he knows he can depend on her regardless of the situation.  Love my kids!